A Practical Guide to Changing Sinful Habits
By Pastor Matt Black
24 February 2008
Lord’s
Day morning
Ephesians 4:22-24
Scripture and Theme: Is there an area of struggle in your life that you might call a “besetting sin”? Do you want to change that part of your life into the image of Jesus Christ?
Jesus Christ died to change us into His image this morning. If He wanted you to remain the same He would not have died for you. Instead Jesus entered into this earth that He made to die for an undeserving, unholy wretch like you and me. He died to bring CHANGE—to take you from your sin and His scorn to His love and your holiness. The title of this morning’s message is “A Practical Guide to Changing Sinful Habits”.
Would you open your Bible to Ephesians 4:17-24 and stand with me as we honor Jesus Christ this morning? It is as if the resurrected Lord stands here among us as we read His precious word about change. What a privilege!
“This I say therefore, and testify in the Lord, that ye henceforth walk not as other Gentiles walk, in the vanity of their mind, 18 Having the understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God through the ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart: 19 Who being past feeling have given themselves over unto lasciviousness, to work all uncleanness with greediness. 20 But ye have not so learned Christ; 21 If so be that ye have heard him, and have been taught by him, as the truth is in Jesus: 22 That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts; 23 And be renewed in the spirit of your mind; 24 And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.”
[Prayer for guidance]
Introduction: Have you ever wondered how you can change the sinful habits in your life? Do you find yourself controlled by your emotions and cravings instead of the Lord Jesus Christ? Do you want to be set free from this world and find your satisfaction in Christ alone? You can! And God has provided a very practical way for you to be conformed into the image of Jesus Christ.
Throughout the Bible, we are given what I call the “Repentance and Replacement principle”.
We don’t just want behavior modification. That’s change that just affects the outside. We want total transformation. That is change that begins within. It is complete change from the inside out.
I. First, we all have the Heartache that we are not more like Jesus Christ. We must recognize that we are not yet perfectly conformed to the image of Jesus Christ. There are still sinful patterns and habits of living that keep getting repeated day in and day out. How many of you here this morning want to get rid of sin in your life and put on Christ? Yes we all do!
Sometimes we get so discouraged because there is even an “old man”—an old sinful way of living—to put off! The fact that we still have some of our sinful habits after we have received Jesus Christ as our Lord and Master breaks our hearts.
So then, how can change happen? How can you and I change into the image of Jesus? You want that don’t you? I need to tell you about two things—first, the mess, and then the mess about the myth.
A. First let me tell you about “the Mess”. How did we get so messed up in the first place? I’m glad you asked!
1. Let me tell you how the mess began. Man was originally designed to reflect and honor God, but we have been twisted and warped by sin so much that on our own it is impossible for us to please God in anything we do (Romans 8:8). We are bent out of shape. And we cannot repair ourselves!!
Ø Our body can become disfigured, and will eventually die.
Ø Our organs malfunction as a result of sin.
Ø And our mind is warped by sinful thinking that is opposed to God.
God created us in His image, but we do not function as God originally intended.[1] We have broken all of the boundaries God has set up. We call that sin.[2]
2. But God says the mess can be undone. We call that change!! Knowing Christ and growing in Him involves your bent up life being straightened out and conformed to the image of Christ (Romans 8:28-30).
Now you know about the mess.
B. But let me tell you about the Myth about the Mess! Some of you do not believe the mess of your sinful habits can be undone. Some of you think that there are sinful areas of your life that you are simply going to have to live with until Jesus comes. Have you ever gotten frustrated and said or just thought, “I’ll never change” in this or that area? I have. I was wrong!
Maybe you are here this morning as a child of God and you say…
Ø “I’ll never be able to stop getting angry and shouting—I can’t change!”
Ø Or, “I’ll never have a clean mind, I’ve got too much baggage—I can’t change!”
Ø Or, “I can never stop lying completely—I’ve done it all my life”.
I’ve said all of the above in my life. I thought I could not change. I WAS WRONG!!! I have changed and developed godly habits in my life by God’s grace. What I was saying was “Well that’s the way I was born and nothing can be done about it!”
II. I want to give you a great Hope for lasting godly change in your life.
A. We have hope in the Person of Christ.
I spoke with a man once about a sin habit in his life. He said, “I know what the Bible says, but…well, that’s just the way I am!” Actually that is not the way you are if you are a Christian. That is the way you were, but if you’re a Christian, what you are is “in Christ”. You are enveloped “in Him”—His very Person and Presence! Jesus Christ is present in you. And when as a Christian you say, “I just don’t have any patience” that is not true! As a Christian, everything that God asks us to be, we already have in Jesus Christ. Everything you could ever hope to be you already have in Jesus Christ!! Our old sinful habits are called “the former” behavior for a reason.
1. Do you ever say WAY MORE than you planned on saying to someone? Have you ever given a way bigger piece of your mind to a person than you intended? Well, “the fruit of the spirit is…temperance” or self control (Galatians 5:23).
2. “But you don’t understand I just don’t have patience. My father was impatient!” In Christ you have patience! “The fruit of the Spirit is…patience” (Galatians 5:22). If you will yield to the Spirit you have all the patience you need to please God!!
3. Have you ever told a lie under pressure? Have you ever exaggerated the truth to make yourself look good? Do you ever present yourself to others as better than you really are? Would everyone agree that these are all sins that God hates that break the ninth commandment: “Thou shalt not bear false witness”? Verse 21 tells us that “the truth is in Jesus”.
It is truly the way you were born, but the Lord Jesus says, “Ye must be born again!” (John 3:3). My precious brother and sister in Christ, “if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new” (2 Corinthians 5:17). If you are in Christ, then you have been chosen, you have been adopted, and you have been purposed to be made like Jesus. God has already worked out your destiny. You are to be like Jesus. There is hope in the Person of Jesus Christ if you are a Christian.
B. There is also hope in the Plan of Jesus Christ. I want you to look at several verses of Scripture that tell us of God’s plan for our sanctification.
1. Look at the certainty of God’s plan.
Ø Ephesians 1:4 says that God has “chosen us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in love”. This verse not only describes our past predestination, but our present disposition. What I am saying is that your election to salvation includes the process of holiness in your life that we call sanctification or being conformed to the image of Jesus Christ. Ephesians 1:11 goes so fare as to say that your entire life has been “predestinated according to the purpose of him who worketh all things after the counsel of his own will”.
Ø Romans 8:29 says the very same thing. We are reminded that God has predestinated you “to be conformed to the image of his Son”.
Ø Jude 1:26, encourages us that God “is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,”
Ø Philippians 1:6 urges us to be “confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ”.
2. Look at the course of God’s plan.
We want change, but it seems so slow, so hard, and so impossible!! You might be like me. I thought when a person came to know Christ life would just get a whole lot easier and God would just change me!
a. And God does change our heart! We call that change “regeneration”. That’s where Christlike change all begins. God takes out the heart of stone and puts a new heart, and a new control center in us (Ezekiel 36:26). This is after much breaking of the old heart and softening of it through His drawing of us to Himself (John 6:44). But finally he gives us a new heart. God regenerates us. It is something that God alone does. I cannot regenerate myself. God must do it as an act of His mercy and grace (Titus 2:5).
b. As a result, we repent and believe. We willingly come to Jesus Christ and receive Him and make Him Lord and Savior of our life. We call that “conversion”. I often refer to it as the line of demarcation where we pass from the Kingdom of darkness to the kingdom of light.
c. Then we begin the process of changing and putting off these sinful habits. We call that process “sanctification”.
Regeneration is what God alone does, but conversion and sanctification are what God empowers us to do. We become more and more holy, more like our precious Saviour Jesus Christ by making Spirit-led choices that establish godly habits. It is just as Romans 8:13 says, “if ye through the Spirit do mortify [PUT TO DEATH, OR PUT OFF] the [SINFUL] deeds of the body, ye shall live.” In other words, the power to change by putting to death sinful habits comes through the power of the Spirit.
Paul says it crystal clear in Galatians 2:20, “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”
We are told in Philippians 2:12-13, “work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. 13 For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.”
So when we feel discouraged, we need to remember, that God is on our side. Everyone he elects to salvation he also predestines to be “conformed to the image of His Son” (Romans 8:29).
But we must also be careful not to think that we just sit back and wait for that divine spark. In case you didn’t realize, you did not come to sinless perfection the moment that you were saved. You must lean on the power of God as you do your part. Though regeneration is a work done by God alone, sanctification is a cooperative venture between you and the Holy Spirit.
Ok, you say, but that’s all nice, but tell me how to change!
III. Now let us look to how we can form godly Habits of change. How can you really change? It seems sooo hard! And it is!
A. There is a real Difficulty when it comes to change. Saying no to sin and yes to God is hard. Paul says “Put off the old, and put on the new”! Paul got his principles of change from Jesus. He is teaching exactly what Jesus taught. Jesus gave his formula for Christlikeness in Matthew 16:24, He said “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.” Jesus equates putting off the old man to something difficult and even humanly impossible. How easy is it to willingly go to a cross and be crucified? That’s how hard it is to change. You need to take up an instrument of death. Your life needs to end. Jesus uses the picture of a cross. A man on a cross was as good as dead. He had no rights. He couldn’t decide what his next meal was, what he would wear, or what he wanted to do with his life. Jesus says take up your cross. Throw out your agenda for life. Deny your plans. You are no longer in the pilot’s seat. You are no longer in control of your life. Let go of your life. Put your life in God’s hands. That’s hard!!
You say, “Ok Pastor, I thought you were going to help me change!” I am.
B. So now, let’s look at the Discipline of change. Discipline is making the same right choice to please God over and over and over again until you do it without even thinking. You take it for granted.
1. You all have an amazing power of habit. In other words, you all are amazingly disciplined people. You are capable of doing things over and over and over again, and you do them so well, you no longer need to consciously think about how to do them.
Ø How many of you know how to drive? The first time you went to drive you were aware of everything you were doing.
Ø How many of you brushed your teeth this morning? Yesterday morning? I no longer brush Katie and Kristen’s teeth for them, but I have brushed Will’s. He’s learning, but one day he will do it by habit.
Ø You put your shoes on this morning, and yesterday, and the day before. You might have even tied your shoes.
2. You all also have an amazing practice of habit. What you practice can be good or bad. Practice makes perfect is not quite true. Perfect practice makes perfect, and sinful practice makes sinful. We are like a computer. Garbage in garbage out. Whatever you put into it is what you get out of it.
Now the reason you think you cannot change is because you are enslaved to a sinful habit. You do it without thinking. You make every resolution in the book to change, but you keep returning to sin over and over again. Why? Because you have practiced it. You have believed it will benefit you.
We need to understand we are no longer what we were. Verse 22, “That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts”.
C. So what is the Process of change? How can I “put on the new man”? How can I “be renewed in the spirit of my mind”? How can I “put on Christ” and “follow Christ” and be “transformed by the renewing of my mind?
1. Examination of self. You need to shine light on your old master. Your sinful habits are a slave master. The Word of God and the Body of Christ will help you with this.
a. Meditation on the Word of God will help you greatly. “Thy Word have I hid in mine heart that I might not sin against thee” (Psalm 119:11). Meditate on the Word and let the light of God’s Word shine on you and uncover the sinful habits in your life.
b. Locate a Mentor. You can also do this by finding a mature Christian and have that person examine you spiritually and act as a mentor in your life.
2. Crucifixion of sinful habits. We are told in verse 22 to “put off concerning the former conversation the old man!” Paul says here that the old man—the old way of thinking and living is “corrupt according to the deceitful lusts”. So we need to stop trusting our old master! You are crucified with Christ, but now you need to practice that in your life! You need to reckon yourself as dead!
But verse 23 says you need to “be renewed in the spirit of your mind…and…put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.” The renewal of mind is in other places called “putting on Christ” (Galatians 3:27) or having “the mind of Christ” (1 Corinthians 2:16).
3. Replacement with Christlike practices. How does this practically take place? Well, let me give the example of a child’s joke.
Q: When is a door not a door?
A: When it is “ajar”!
Now that teaches us a very important truth. A door is not a door when it is something completely different.
Replacement in Ephesians 4:23-24 is not just behavioral modification—it is inward transformation. Here it is called to be “renewed in the spirit of your mind” (verse 23) and to “put on” something that God has “created in righteousness and true holiness” (verse 24).
So let’s apply this to the examples later in the chapter.
Let’s talk about liars and thieves.
We are told in verse 25 to put “away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour”. So…
Q: When is a liar not a liar?
A: When he stops lying?
Is a thief no longer a thief when he stops stealing? Not at all. A thief has to stop stealing in order to enjoy his dinner. He is not at the time stealing. He may have made a sincere resolution to stop, but when he finds himself in a financial pinch, he’ll start stealing again. “In other words, thieves do not steal at all times, liars do not lie every minute of every day, and drunks are not always drunk. Just because there has been a STOP in the behavior, does NOT mean that a permanent change has come.”[3]
In Ephesians 4:22-24, Paul explains exactly how lasting change occurs. A Christian must change inwardly in his heart—not just in his actions. He must be renewed in His mind and heart, not just change behavior.
So…
Q: When is a liar not a liar?
A: When he stops lying?
No, the correct answer is: When he starts telling the truth: verse 25, put “away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour”.
Putting off lying will do you no good without replacement. And if you try to put on righteous living without putting off, or repentance, we call that hypocrisy.
So Q: When is a thief not a thief?
A: When he starts working and giving.
And see here that it is not just practicing the right behavior. It is in other places called “walking in the Spirit” “Putting on Christ” and “walking with God”. 2 Corinthians 3:18 says that as we look into the mirror of the Word of God, we are “changed into His image”.
D. What are the Ingredients for change?
1. Endurance. We renew our mind “day by day”. We must take up our cross “daily”. You must persevere! There must be continual change toward Christlikeness. We can never arrive at perfection in this life, but we can live with a pure conscience. That means we are not yet sinless, but we are sinning less! The Christian life is called a “walk” not a rest!
Endurance is absolutely necessary. No one learns to tie their shoes, put in contact lenses, use a yo-yo, roller skate, drive a car, play a musical instrument, or ride a bike without training wheels without persistence and endurance. You keep at it until you get it right. Then you repeat and repeat and repeat until you can do it without thinking. When you do it without thinking it can be called what the Bible calls your “conversation” or manner of living.
2. The Holy Spirit. You will never be able to change by pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps. A car does not go on its own. It needs a driver. A horse runs wild until it has a rider on top of it. The Holy Spirit empowers and directs our change. How does He do it? Is it mystical? No! We are not simply sitting around navel gazing waiting for God to drop down on us.
3. The Word of God. The Holy Spirit changes us through the Word of God. We grow stronger in obedience as we gain more and more faith and confidence in God. Who do we gain more faith? There is only one way! Romans 10:17, “Faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the Word of God”.
Conclusion: Let me close by giving you some positive evidence that all change is possible. If I were in a court of law you all would be my evidence. You are all living epistles!
Has anyone here had lasting change with getting rid of lying? Stealing? Lust and bad thinking? Proud talk and cursing?
You are all living epistles—you are the living proof that God is alive and at work in this world today.
Now let me challenge you right now. There is a whole world out there that has never heard this message in a clear way. You can do it. We are asking people to sign up for the counseling conference next year for training. We are told not only to teach, but to teach all things whatsoever Jesus commanded. That means people can’t just learn, they must learn to LIVE and be a doer of the work!! May God give us grace to change into His image, and as a result see this whole community turned upside down for Christ!!